"Look out of the window, keep staring till you lose the train of thought. You finally see your reflection in the window and in all probability your lips will break into a smile because you realise how you have been looking all these days and how you thought you actually were".
Yeah this doesnt have any relation whatsoever with what i intend to write, but its tough for me to delete such things. Just like memories. They linger on just like the teasing scent of the roses that mum just threw out of the window. I think of it and I see a vase full of bright-coloured yellow roses and when I open my eyes, they are gone. And just like the roses, there are people in life who you instantly see when you close your eyes, but are gone when you come back to reality.
I dont know if its the rough cold weather outside or the fog of my memories inside thats having the effect on me, but it is for sure taking me on a trip down the memory lane. I miss so many people in my life, around whom I thought my life was built. But I've grown up *smirks*, learnt to stand on my own, and like all those who stand on their own, am pretty much alone as well. And confused too. Where is my home? People say home is where heart is. Where is my heart? Do I have one? Do I love anyone? I dont think so, and as people have been pointing out of late, I surely dont love anyone, dont have time for anyone, not for myself as well. not enough to even look into that mirror, to lose my train of thought once again. Not enough time to give life another shot. Maybe..on second thoughts..fuck that..Listen to the whistle, my train has come. the train of my thoughts, to take me someplace where maybe I can know what is it that I really want...
